Update 2.21.16

news_headline_300I am both embarrassed and ashamed of where I am now.  I have entered a time of anger.  I have become irritable and testy with people whom I admire and respect.  They have done nothing to cause my irritability, but nevertheless, they received it.  Fortunately, the Holy Spirit began to work on me and I apologized, recognizing I was Continue reading

Update 2.9.16

news_headline_300Yesterday was a very, very hard day!  It started with a sinus pressure headache that made me irritable.  By lunch time things had leveled out and everything seemed to be alright.

After lunch, as I was working, I began thinking of something my hair stylist said on Saturday, when I stopped in to get a haircut.  She greeted me with “Hey, baby!”  I smiled because no one has called me Continue reading

Update 2.3.16

I hnews_headline_300ave been told that I have the tenacity of a bulldog that I am stubborn, determined, focused, and hard headed.  By the way, these adjectives are listed for the English Bulldog breed characteristics.   I admit that I am all of these.

I had an employer who said to me, “Elkins, I bet if you lost both of your legs in the middle of a forest, you would try to crawl out.  Wouldn’t you?”  I said, “Yes, sir.  I would certainly try too.”  I don’t give up on things easily.
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Have I Lost My Identity?

WhoAmI_300I have been making plans on remodeling my master bedroom and ensuite bathroom.  The shower had been leaking which caused the bathroom flooring to be disgusting.   I was going to do it a year sooner, but it would have caused a great inconvenience for Terrie.  So now there is no excuse and no need to wait.

As I was reviewing the carpet in the bedroom, I decided to replace it with the same material I was going to use in the bathroom, porcelain tile that looks like wood flooring. I talked with the tile guy Continue reading

Am I Denying The Denial?

walking-away-300On Wednesday, I hit an emotional brick wall!  I may have just come out of shock!  I had been feeling pretty good and thought I had been transitioning fairly well.  I knew I was to have “alone time” with the Lord.  Time to learn from Him and to follow the impressions that He has given in my mind and heart.  I understood that and thought it was needed and beneficial.
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A “New” Normal

Iheartbeat liked the “old normal”.  I was quite pleased with it and I wasn’t looking to change my status because I was very satisfied with the “old”.  The “old normal” was being married to a woman I adored.  We loved each other, enjoyed one another, and enjoyed our life together.

The “old normal” ended November 23, 2015 when Terrie died  peacefully in her sleep. Continue reading